Häusliche Gewalt: der Unterschied zwischen Männern und Frauen

A recent survey by the Centers for Disease Control found that among physically aggressive couples, 71% of the instigators in nonreciprocal partner violence were female. And last year Renee McDonald of Baylor University published a study in the Journal of Family Psychology with almost identical results.

Das berichtet Carey Roberts auf der Website von Wendy McElroys liberalen Feministinnen. Diese oder ähnliche Zahlen sind ja nun bekannt – nicht der breiten Öffentlichkeit, aber wohl den meisten Genderama-Lesern. Allerdings hat Roberts einen interessanten Unterschied zwischen den Geschlechtern festgestellt: Während Männer vor anderen Kerlen nicht stolz mit ihren Schlägen prahlen, sind Frauen anscheinend aus einem anderen Holz geschnitzt. Dies veranschaulicht er sehr hübsch an diesem Artikel des amerikanischen Frauenmagazins "Jezebel".

Zunächst berichten die Macherinnen von einer Mini-Umfrage innerhalb der Redaktion:

According to a study of relationships that engage in nonreciprocal violence, a whopping 70% are perpetrated by women. So basically that means that girls are beating up their BFs and husbands and the dudes aren't fighting back. With Amy Winehouse busting open a can of whupass on her husband last week, we decided to conduct an informal survey of the Jezebels to see who's gotten violent with their men. After reviewing the answers, let's just say that it'd be wise to never ever fuck with us. One Jezebel got into it with a dude while they were breaking up, while another Jez went nuts on her guy and began violently shoving him. One of your editors heard her boyfriend flirting on the phone with another girl, so she slapped the phone out of his hands and hit him in the face and neck... "partially open handed." Another editor slapped a guy when "he told me he thought he had breast cancer." (Okay, that one made us laugh really hard.) And lastly, one Jez punched a steady in the face and broke his glasses. He had discovered a sex story she was writing about another dude on her laptop, so he picked it up and threw it. And that's when she socked him. He was, uh, totally asking for it.

Dann sind die Leserinnen mit ihren Kommentaren an der Reihe. Erwartungsgemäß (irgendwo müssen die 70 Prozent ja herkommen) können sehr viele von ihnen berichten, handgreiflich geworden zu sein. Und viele haben auch keine großen Probleme damit. Um nur mal ein paar Beispiele aus diesem Endlosstrang herauszugreifen:

*snicker* It's okay, ladies. They can just consider it payback for binding our feet, shoving our chunklet asses into corsets, leaving chick babies on mountaintops, droolin over size 0 asses, and generally making us miserable for centuries. My favorite phrase that no one doubts? "I will punch you in the neck."

Yeah, I've punched the shit out of a guy. But I don't like to brag.

I once dated an alcoholic (rite of passage for all good little girls) who came over drunk and got in my face. I punched him hard enough to knock him on his ass. After I dumped him, he served me with a restraining order, which I proudly showed off to all his friends. Stupid wimp.

I slap my boyfriend on a semi-regular basis. It always hurts me more than it hurts him. And he usually agrees that he deserves it.

I think every man I have been with has received a slap from me. Every single one deserved it, says alot about my taste in men!

I've never beat up a boyfriend, but I once gave an ex a solid black eye. It was the greatest moment of my entire life.

I tried to run one of my ex's over with my car. After the gazillion fight that week, I was so sick of him. He walked out mid scream of mine, so I got in my car and went after him. The neighbor's yard fell victim to my wrath, unfortunately. And the poor woman was there gardening. She never said anything to me though. Wonder why HAHAHAHA

Es gibt auch das Statement eines männlichen Lesers:

As someone who has been both slapped AND punched by more than one ex- girlfriend, there's a big difference between getting slapped (even slapped hard) and getting full-on attacked. And each time, I definitely deserved it. Actually, I think we usually do.

Und schließlich auch einige wenige Stimmen der Vernunft:

Seriously? If these comments were from men celebrating their finest acts of physical violence against their partners, people would be going batshit insane with outrage, and rightfully so. Just because women aren't as strong as men doesn't men they can't do some serious harm. Especially if the dudes aren't fighting back, which in the majority of cases it sounds like they're not. Why is it then acceptable to physically assault men when they make women angry? Because they "deserve" it? Way to go, equal rights!

"It's okay to hit a guy if he's asking for it!" is what I've learned today. Sounds a lot like what the abusers of our clients say. Guess we need to change our policies here.

After reading the flood of extreme zero-tolerance comments to yesterday's grey-rape redux, I'm amazed to see the same community laughing about domestic violence directed against men...

Vor der Maischberger-Sendung morgen abend, in der offenbar so getan werden wird, als bedeute häusliche Gewalt ausschließlich weibliche Opfer, ist dieser Strang vielleicht genau die richtige Dosis an Wirklichkeit.